Scotch Files: Jamie Foxx Special Edition

By now I am sure that you have recieved the Jamie Foxx email at least 5 times. For some reason, every person that sends this link thinks that know one else has heard of what is (supposedly) going on.

If you have been living under a rock or are too scared to log into your email accounts because you think Bush is in there waiting for you, here is the story:

Please take the time to forward the below message to everyone in your address book. NBC is not doing any marketing & publicity on Jamie's Music Special on NBC because he stood his ground and wouldn't have any white guest as they requested. To make it even worse he had two controversial guest stars, that do not fit the "NBC profile" on his show. Tune in to find out who they are. They are purposely putting his show up against the second week of American Idol in hopes that it will fail. This will give them the excuse to never give another black person a music special because "it doesn't work". Let's show them that it does work, and that we support each other. Tivo Idol, and watch Jamie. I saw the taping, it is a good show.

J Foxx making history on NBC. This is the first time NBC has ever aired an entire young urban African American cast on a music special. We need to show support. This was not an easy sell for Jamie and he stood his ground to make it happen the way he saw fit. JAMIE FOXX MUSIC SPECIAL WILL BROADCAST WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 25TH @ 8:00PM PST on NBC. PLEASE MAKE IT A POINT WATCH! There will be surprise special guests.

I received it yesterday and was kind of appalled because I had heard nothing of the special, so it must be true about what they are saying. Granted, I only watch 30 minutes of NBC a week. But, as I received it for the millionth time, I realized what was really going on. NBC did advertise it! They just used a free and clever strategy.

They drafted an email expressing the racist tactics they were employing to "hold a brother down" and they knew "we" would fall for it. And we did, wholeheartedly. Seriously, think about it. You probably recived it as many times in one day as you have received the email about Tommy Hilfiger being on 'Oprah' and saying he didn't make his clothes for black people in your whole email life. Some of you reading this still think it is true, unmoved by the fact that Oprah has confirmed that this "event" NEVER took place.

It has gotten to the point where one of my boys and I are forwarding it to each other everytime someone sends it to us. But we make it better by adding subtitles like, "Jamie Foxx is going to be executed if you do not watch this special!" Please people stop, I beg you! And the funny thing is, according to my Comcast cable DVR, they are re-airing the show again on Friday night. Sounds like failure to me!

I have to give it to them though, the email is perfect! It uses reverse psychology telling you what not to watch, by giving you reasons they want the 'Foxx' show to fail. Literally creating a battle of the Fox(x)es! Then there is the cliffhanging info about "special guests" that NBC is not happy about having on their network. I'd like to guess, "Kanye West and his great NBC diatribe about "Bush not liking black people" for $1,000," Mr. Trebek. Which begs the question, "Then why would they air it?" They actually control what is aired on THEIR network.

NBC must be licking their chops in anticipation of tonight. This show might top the season finale of 'Friends' with the push it has deceptively received through this email campaign. Along with Jamie Foxx, they are going to laugh all the way to their advertiser's pockets. It's like sweeps before sweeps happens. For those that don't know, sweeps is when networks pull out the "big dogs" to draw in large viewership, so that they can set their rates for interested advertisers to buy commercial time.

So get your TVs set to NBC and your Tivo ready to record 'Idol', you are about to be part of the largest Punk'd ever. But, at least you are getting a great show. How do I know? The email says the person saw the taping? They know everything else, why should this be any different.

Seriously though, the director of the show was on the radio this morning and said that it is in fact a great show that people of all ages and races should enjoy. Special guests include, Mary J. Blige, the Game, Snoop Dogg, Stevie Wonder and more.

See isn't free advertising grand?

Back to the Future

I am not even going to apologize for the hiatus. It was, what it was. Actually, I was ducking the "intelligence gathering" that your boy "Shrub" has the Nice Secret Agent group collecting. I am not trying to show up on any lists. Especially since I live "up the street." Then again, the way they are Ben Vereening email, phone lines and library cards, it probably doesn't even matter. It is actually kind of sickening and I am tempted to purposely say shit that registers down there in Ft. Meade. Kind of like the way I used to say stupid stuff on the phones at my old company cause I know they had somebody listening. Or at the very least, recording the convos for listening at a later date. They used to feed us the same thing they are feeding us about Pat Act- We are a secured building and it is in the name of "safety."

There is word that someone at my current company is monitoring my internet activity including this blog and my email traffic. If so, I am already up the creek with no paddle. Why stop now?

It's not that I have some kind of death wish, but "Shrub" has made it apparent that he and his carpet-bagging brigade are going to do whatever they want. Why shouldn't I? In which case, enough of "Operation Code Words."

Seriously, people can't even Google "Tig O' Bitties" without it popping up on someone's list? Is porn the new way that Bin Laden and terrorists are pushing their propaganda? Maybe they are going to "24" us with some silicone-laced breasts. We all know Jack Bauer has problems doing his job and having a love life, so Bin Laden has come with the ultimate distraction- breasts! How could Bauer save us with 44DDs on the brain? How can he question alleged terrorists with cleavage the size of Sherman Clump's crack?

Maybe Bush just wants someone else to do the "research," so the First Lady doesn't catch him with a history full of porn links in his browser. If that is the case, why not just tap Kirk Franklin's computer? He's the admitted porn-a-holic.

*takes a moment to "Stomp" in the name of the Heavenly Father, while all the people say...*

Hell, why not holla at R. Kelly. He has proved you can partake in child porn, record and publish it and end up singing the National Anthem at a boxing match with steppers and ad libs like, "Come on people, clap your hands!" All while you haven't gone to trial on charges derived from the molestation tapes. What is more American than that?

Whatever the case is, I figure I am going to keep flexing my right to free speech until it is revoked next week. Or until I am mysteriously found on the side of the road with crack sprinkled on me and the gun that was used to kill Kennedy, MLK and David Palmer.

Just for the record: If yall hear that I committed suicide by jumping off of anything. Know for a fact that it is a lie! I don't do heights like Palestinians lining up to see 'Munich!'